Sunday, May 30, 2010

Karma Police

When i first imagined this blog post, it was with pleasure.

Saturday night, at Tommy's request, i agreed to drive a couple of friends from Clarkston up into the Mill Creek Watershed so they could go looking for antlers. In order to get to the starting point by dawn we needed to leave the Estate by 4:00am. I wasn't really what kind of people go out at 4 in the morning to find antlers but if they were friends of Tommy, they couldn't be that bad. ( I found out later that they call themselves "Horn Nuts")

On the way up we talked about Women, Law, and Bigfoot sightings. The ride was enjoyable and the view from the hill was fantastic. My plan was to return home, ruminate on my experience, and write something profound about preconceived ideas...

Then i got stuck.

On the way down the mountain i slid in some snow and ended up with my front right tire totally submerged in compact, crunchy, slush-snow and the other three spinning like hamster wheels in a vacuum. It happened to be in the same spot that the guys had shown me bear scratchings and wolf tracks. I spent the next six hours playing phone tag with Tommy, Alban, Phil, My Parents, and the Cops. I'll let you guess which of those options was the least helpful. After trying to dig out with a rock, I was finally saved by a couple bearded men with a huge Ford truck who were just "out for a drive."

I'm not really sure what the moral of this story is. Maybe it's that Karma doesn't really exist and sometimes you get screwed when you try to do nice things. Or that the police really are nearly worthless.

The story is funnier if you hear it in person, i promise.

Friday, May 28, 2010

The pathfinder law is for me to ...

I remember in 1080p clarity an image from my childhood. I suppose that's not too unusual, except that it's not an image of something I actually saw but of something I imagined. In Sabbath school one morning I recall imagining an image of a dark blue soft-bound bible sitting on a dark shelf covered in dust and cobwebs. Every once in a while that image comes to my mind, usually when I think of neglect – the state in which this blog has been for several weeks.

Why the Pathfinder logo? For some reason, whenever that image would show up in my thinking, I would immediately attach it to a tenant of the Pathfinder law. But I just realized it doesn't really fit. The Pathfinder Law is for me to ...

do my honest part
care for my body
keep a level eye
be courteous and obedient
walk softly in the sanctuary
keep a song in my heart
and go on God's errands

nope, nothing there about neglect, but I'm as sure snake skin that a Pathfinder wouldn't neglect his communal blog, and I think it's time someone add that to the Pathfinder Law.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Hannah Montana Suffers Major Setback

A month ago David and Alban announced that Mylie Cyrus was off their list of eligible starlets. The main cause of her topple from on-high (besides her under-age status) was her poor showing on American Idol. While some have claimed that her pole dancing at the Teen Choice Awards gave Mylie extra consideration, David and Alban have chosen to show her no mercy. This may be more significant than you think. Without Mylie Cyrus providing ample distraction, David might actually start pursuing Taylor Swift. Alban, on the other hand, could get caught up by some indie musician and might actually obtain access.

Lest our speculations get out of hand, let me provide some solace. Though interpretations of this development have been wild and varied, all this talk seems to be empty bloviation since David and Tommy still refuse to remove the combination Mylie Cyrus/Hannah Montana poster in their bathroom.