Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The Leopard may be the smallest of the "big four," but it is definitely the sexiest. You're probably thinking, "what?... that doesn't follow at all." However, I think after a little analysis, you'll agree it probably doesn't matter.
First, the Leopard is well traveled. Their territory spans across eastern and southern Asia and Africa, from Siberia to South Africa. However, due to hunting and deforestation, they have been largely confined to sub-Sahara Africa. This is sexy for a couple reasons. First, as Alban would be quick to point out, a well traveled woman with a broad knowledge of culture and geography is undeniably sexy. Second, why would someone hunt something? Perhaps because it is a little mysterious? Even Dangerous? Also sexy.
Second, Leopards get what they want. Leopards are successful in the wild due largely to their opportunistic nature, adaptability, and tremendous speed. In addition, they are stealthy, strong and able to climb trees in a single bound. They dominate, kill and eat anything they can get their manicured paws on. Gentlemen, if a Leopard wants you, she will get you. This is scary, but also sexy. Like Tina Fey telling a ghost story in the dark.
Finally, Leopards are doing everything they can to restore the natural order of life. Leopards limit their production of babies to sustainable levels based on the availability of food so that no one will go hungry or be over hunted. Leopard mothers also save money on clothes by always wearing a sexy, Leopard print tracksuit. They try to live by Sir Elton John's advice, "You should never take more than you give, in the circle of life." Sexy.
The Tickle Closet thinks that a Leopard would be an ideal pet for a hip, laid-back 20-something who is looking for a sexy partner that is in tune with global social issues. A preference for Leopard print tracksuits is also a bonus.
This concludes our series on the Big Cats. As you spend time with your own snugly little jungle cat, take a moment to remember that even though you think your cat enjoys all the overrated comforts of suburbia, he is really dreaming of stalking large prey through the jungle or chasing down a herd of water buffalo. Watch your back, you never know when the wild will call.